I Don't Know Anymore

I don't know where i am anymore, I fell like I'm losing my head. Things seem more complicated than it sounds. I'm losing touch to my closest friends, i never wanted any of this to happen and for some weird reason i just don't seem to understand why that is. I want to go back in time where everything was alright. Or go forward in time to where everything works out. 

Honestly to say, sometimes in life i feel like I'm alone.  There's no one out there i could talk to. But then again maybe its just me. I'm tired of making excuses that I'm alright when I'm not, cause the truth is that I miss my parents by brother. I miss having a family. Its like every time i call my mom or my dad i end up crying, i hate it so much but as much as i feel so upset inside i have to let them know that I'm okay. 

I miss my best friends, i miss talking to them all the time. I miss spending every weekend with them, I miss always hanging out at the REC with them. Maybe its just high school and we're all supposed to go different ways, but i want it like no matter what way we go that we'll still be friends. Because i don't know how it'll be if we weren't friends. We've been friends for a couple of years now and you became one of my best friends, but some of these days i feel just so different. I don't know what to do, cause i feel like I'm trying... But then i feel like I'm failing... I don't know why. 

Sometimes i just want to scream, yell so loud that the whole world can hear me. Sometimes i want to cry and fill up a ocean. Sometimes i just want to get away with the world, but it keeps coming back at me. Life's hard, but no one ever said it was easy. I just want to be happy, but maybe thats to much to ask for. 

When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.-Helen Keller